People transform people. Tech toys and TV can’t change someone like a great mentor can. Social media is powerful, but not as powerful as a mature believer sitting down with a teachable young leader and pouring his/her life into them. I know in my life, the greatest satisfaction comes from having a vulnerable relationship with another person who is like minded. If this is true, how do we build stronger relationships?
1. Discover other people
We have to be masters at the art of asking questions; asking open-ended ones that make people think and uncover something about themselves. These questions unlock personality, values, and hidden secrets. When the question is asked properly, people will want to open their heart and tell you things they have never told someone before.
2. Never measure
Often in relationships we measure ourselves against others. We look at the other person and want what they have, or we value the person based on what they have. Relationships work best when both people see value in each other and themselves. God has given us all amazing gifts, be happy with yours.
3. Confess
In scripture James says, “confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, that you may be healed.” Notice we are not forgiven, only Jesus does that, we are healed. There is something special about telling someone your short comings, it releases guilt and allows us to say to each other, “I have been there and I know what your going through.” At this moment, relationship is at its finest.
My name is Doug Franklin and I serve youth workers through a ministry called LeaderTreks. I love youth ministry and the people who serve in it. I work with an incredible team creating tools and resources enabling youth workers to develop students into leaders. I want to influence youth workers to challenge students and prepare them for leadership in the kingdom of God.
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John Bako
June 26th, 2010 at 2:56 pm
Thanks again for your articles that i have found helpful in my ministry to teenagers’ workers.
I want your insight into what i can describe as a relationship gone sour as it relates to sharing my life with a young worker whom I have been grooming. It came to a point where he became involved in arelationship which the department felt was unholy. As a result he was discilined as he refused to stop the relationship even when he was advised to do so. He now feels that he was wrongly discilined and that has affected our relationship