My dog Diesel has a new obedience trainer. He just started the other day. The first thing he said to me was, “This is about leadership training.” My first thought was, “Awesome! This I know something about.” My second thought was, “Hey, why I am paying this guy $100 an hour for this?” Then I realized he was talking about dog leadership and to be honest I don’t know that much about dog leadership. When this trainer talks about dog leadership he is talking about the leader of the pack and how the leader goes first in everything. He walks in front, he eats first and he sets the agenda. The other dogs go where he goes and they do what he does. I love dog leadership; the only problem is the leader dog has to be able to beat everyone else up. OK, maybe not the best idea for leadership. Ever feel like some of us humans lead like dogs? We put ourselves in front and we take first and we beat people up who don’t do exactly what we tell them. Check yourself: ask a friend to evaluate your leadership, maybe even ask other people for you. Do people feel uplifted by your leadership or beat up? Have him give you the honest feedback of people and be humble; listen and make changes if needed.

For most of us small groups is our program for discipleship. We want students to join a group and begin to grow in their faith in the context of a caring community. For our students who have been attending small groups and are actively growing in their faith we offer them the opportunity to go on our summer missions trip. We do this because its a well known fact that missions flow out of a mature heart for God.

I think things are changing – Many students today have a heart for people in poverty and slavery. Students want to bring an end to AIDS and the lack of clean water. They no longer think Christ, first compassion second. They are burdened by injustice, not the fact that people don’t know Jesus. It’s not that they don’t care about Christ but their hearts want an end to the fixable. Clean water, poverty, hunger, lack of medicine; fix these things first and then share Christ.

This thinking must be engaged – what if we were to allow seekers to go on mission trips and then invited them to small group? What if we mirror students’ thinking with our programing?

I like to challenge students mostly because it allows them to see their potential. When students understand their potential you sometimes can’t stop how big they will dream. BUT challenging students can be difficult without a relationship and permission. Now I am sure you get the relationship part: students have to know you love and want their best, and that comes though a relationship. It’s the permission that we sometimes forget. It used to be you could challenge a student just because you were an adult and you knew better, but not today. Students don’t just think adults have the answers; they look at this world, leadership and marriages and they get the message that we adults are often screwed up. So just because you want to help them grow doesn’t mean they want your input. You have to earn it through relationships and start it with permission. Most of the time when I ask a student’s permission to challenge them, they say yes. A few ask me to clarify or be specific (not many people ask them this question so it can catch them off guard). Students appreciate when I ask them and they allow me to go deeper when I have their permission.

I want to simplify the approach to youth ministry. Really boil it down to what is important. When I do that this is what I come up with…

Leadership Relationship
The three main leadership relationships are church leadership, ministry volunteers, and parents. Have you invested enough time and resources into your three core leadership relationships? Create a plan to strengthen these core relationships and you will see your ministry grow.

Program Planning
Does your program match up with your mission statement? If your mission is to Reach, Build and Equip does every program event on your schedule match-up to one of these purposes? Planning this way will clearly communicate the mission to every member of your team.

Ministry Management
Do you have a handle of budgets, parent release forms, and legal issues? More youth pastors lose credibility over these issues. Make sure you don’t overlook this just because you don’t like it.

Staff Skills
Does all of your staff know how to build a relationship with a student, or run a small group? Does your staff know the difference between asking an open ended question and an application question? Train your staff and see the difference it makes when adults are intentional about building relationships with students.

Partnership Development
Are you trying to be an expert at everything? Do you understand small groups, staff development, church management, evangelism, how students learn, culture trends, missions and parents? Admit it, you need help. Knowing who to partner with can take your ministry to the next level. Look for partnership with organizations that share your values and vision.